Epiphany

So, just recently I had an epiphany, and along with that epiphany came a new awareness. First I will describe the epiphany, though. Sitting in my engineering class during fourth period yesterday, I suddenly realized that engineering was not what I wanted to do for a career. I realized that, although I was good at it, it wasn't really fulfilling to me and was in fact stressful. I know for a fact that it's stressful because I've worked on several engineering projects, both in and out of school, and there are so many little details you must get exactly right in order for a part to fit with another. In some cases, if it's not perfect, you might have to completely restart from the beginning. So, I have concluded that engineering is a stressful career for me, and it doesn't even give me a fulfilling feeling at all.
After that epiphany, I took my own interest inventory, thinking about what I like and what I'm somewhat good at. I concluded that I want to help people daily and make good money while I'm doing it. So, also after taking a career test online, I've decided that I want to be a neurological physician. Now, I'm sure any readers of this blog are thinking, Where in the world did this come from?, because previously I had talked about being a soldier and all of the different disciplines within the military. Here's the secret behind it all. Over the past six months, I have been toying with the idea of being a doctor, each time throwing it away just for it to resurface again and again. Also, over the past couple months came the awareness. The awareness was primarily about military life. Over the past couple months, I've been contemplating the consequences of military life, and I've finally accepted the fact that, if I'm in the military, my future children won't have a steady childhood at all and will grow up without seeing their father for half the time. If I ever have kids, which I hope to some day, I really don't want them to have to move constantly; I want them to have a steady, structured childhood, during which I can be by their side virtually every step of the way.
Now, that might seem a little distant, and it really is (at least I hope!). But still, no matter how distant those times may be, it still doesn't change the truth of the situation and what the future may hold for me and anyone in my life.